USING OUR FREE TIME FOR OURSELVES
Because we deserve to receive it as much as everybody else...
Hello there, dear readers
I hope this issue finds you well and facing up to the oncoming Autumn. There is no getting away from the fact that this is one of the hardest times of the year and, as I’ve covered before, we need to be ensuring we look after ourselves during this oh-so- hectic run up to Christmas.
And this ties in nicely with the topic I want to cover in this issue.
In this edition, I’m talking about the extra time we get back as our children get older and become less dependent, and then fly the nest for good.
The extra time we gratefully pull back starts in small pockets initially, and then as time progresses, it stretches out into huge wads of time, which, initially can be very disconcerting.
We aren’t used to having those swathes of time available to us, and our brain - usually so geared up for child-rearing and other comittments - doesn’t know how to cope. It’s not used to the vacuum that occurs when you don’t have to think about the welfare of children or teenagers (or even older) and things suddenly become scary. And you may experience the odd wobble or two.
If my experience is anything to go by, it might take a while to find the right things for you to fill that time warp. And that might mean experimenting with a few things and seeing what suits you best and gives you a sense of purpose.
Whilst you’re experimenting with stuff, may I implore that you use some of the time to try and re-visit the you that you were before child-rearing and other commitments took all your spare time.
What I’m talking about is doing the things that make you remember you are a person in your own right. And things that increase your sense of self and self-worth.
Things like:
Taking the time to do a proper make-up job each day. Okay, you may be having a day working from home where you see no-one but the postman, but by taking the trouble to invest in yourself, you are sending messages to your subconscious that you MATTER!
Taking yourself out for the day. Obviously this relies on having the money, resources and time available, but I’ll wager that women at our stage in life can find the odd day in the month where they can have a day away from the norm to spend totally on themselves. And it so much feeds in to how they feel about themselves.
Try to get the recommended 150 minutes per week of active exercise. This can be difficult to assess, so either an investment in something like a FitBit or Apple Watch or, if money is tight, download a free fitness app like Strava - which will let you know how active you’ve been. Keeping active stimulates the production of those neurochemicals such serotonin and endorphins. These are ones that help to keep you on even keel and feel good about yourself, even hours, or sometimes days, after you’ve done some exercise. And the exercise method you choose doesn’t matter too much. You can do anything so long as it gets you slightly out of breath and, more importantly, you enjoy it.
Of course, these are just suggestions at this point stage, but do you see my drift? By selecting something that you enjoy and very subtly (and probably quite slowly) improves your self image and how you think about yourself.
So, instead of being a weeping mess on the sofa wondering what she’s going to do with the rest of her life now, you can start to be the sassy mid-life women you always were. You just needed to find her ;)
OTHER WAYS TO GET YOUR 45 NOT OUT FIX…
Alongside this newsletter, I have a number of other channels that work in tandem with the newsletter. One of the most active is the 45 Not Out Facebook group. This is growing nicely with new members, and is stuffed to the gills with good stuff that women of our age need to know about.
It’s also a fab place to inspire and support platform where members of the group post ideas and generally uplift their fellow members.
If you’re a subscriber of the newsletter, then it might be considering joining in the fun in the Facebook group.
You can join the group by clicking on the link here and asking to join. It would be great to have you onboard
So there you have it - another issue from me. I hope you found it useful and that something resonated with you.
I’ll be back in a fortnight’s time with the next edition.
In at the meantime, look after yourselves and stay safe, well & strong.
Till then
Una x