BEFORE YOU LEAP INTO 2026....
Read this. It'll help you start your year right.....
Hello there, you lovely 45 Not Out person!
I hope you had the Christmas break that you wished for and you’re now feeling refreshed and ready for the new year ahead.
I’m writing this on the very last day of 2025, and naturally, as humans our brains naturally turn to thinking about the year ahead. And the very natural thing to do, both as humans and also as mid-life and older women, is to crash on and write a To-Do list for the year, if not jot down your individual goals, and include anything and everything you want to achieve in 2026.
And even looking at the list, let alone undertaking each and every task, can be overwhelming. And eventually exhausting enough that leads to burn out.
So, here’s advice from me that I learnt during 2025, when I felt truly on my way to burn out (my mother died in July 25 and I launched into work to distract myself. Never the best way to deal with grief).
It’s okay to set goals and intentions. But make them achievable without stretching you to your limits.
Because that’s where I was in late summer 2025. But I managed to swerve full blown burn out by listening to how I REALLY felt, not how I think I should have felt. And by operating within my limits, thereby very gradually rebuilding my strength and capacity, I managed to recover myself.
So, knowing this time of year has always been a trigger for me to plan and get going, I’m taking my own advice that I discovered last summer, from those that know more about these things that I do, and am being more measured in the tasks I set myself.
And if you’re anything like many women I speak to, this is when the urge to “get going again”, because it’s the start of a new year can creep in.
You start thinking:
I should get organised
I should plan the year
I should clear the decks
I should use this time productively
Here’s what I want to gently remind you of:
You don’t need to rush your return to normal.
And in our midlife and older years, doing so can cost more than it gives.
Why going steady matters more in our mid and older years
When we’re younger, we bounce back quickly.
We push, reset, start again.
But by midlife, our nervous systems are wiser.
They don’t respond well to sudden acceleration after rest.
Starting the year more slowly than you think you should isn’t failure.
It’s a buffer zone — a recalibration period where your body and mind are quietly integrating what the year has held.
If you leap straight into:
intense goal-setting
big plans
over-ambitious schedules
“I’ll do everything differently from the 1st January”
…you can end up overwhelmed before the year has even properly begun.
And overwhelm doesn’t mean you’re doing life wrong.
It means you skipped a vital pause.
The hidden power of the slow return
Think of the start of January as a soft landing.
Your energy is still lower.
Your system is still settling.
Your intuition is more available than usual.
The weather’s rubbish (well, it is in the Northern Hemisphere!)
This is not the time to decide everything.
It’s the time to notice.
What feels heavy.
What feels finished.
What feels quietly exciting.
What you don’t want to carry forward.
Midlife wisdom doesn’t shout.
It whispers — and the start of January is when you can actually hear it.
Common traps women fall into right now
Let’s normalise a few things many women do at this time:
Over-planning the year in one sitting
Making unrealistic promises to themselves
Filling diaries before energy has returned
Treating rest as something to “get over with”
Confusing enthusiasm with readiness
None of this makes you weak.
It makes you human — and socialised to equate worth with output.
But this stage of life asks for a different rhythm.
Gentle hacks to avoid doing too much, too soon
Here are some midlife-friendly ways to protect your energy and still feel grounded and intentional:
1. Use the “Low Bar Rule”
For the first few weeks of January, set the bar deliberately low.
Ask: What is the smallest useful thing I could do today?
Then stop when it’s done.
Momentum grows from completion, not exhaustion.
2. Plan in pencil, not pen
If you’re itching to plan, sketch ideas loosely.
No final decisions. No pressure.
Think options, not obligations.
3. Re-enter life at 70%, not 100%
You don’t need full capacity on day one.
Aim for 70% energy and build gradually.
Your nervous system will thank you.
4. Limit how much you talk about “the year ahead”
Too much future-talk can create anxiety.
Balance it with presence: walks, quiet mornings, gentle routines.
5. Choose one anchor habit — not five
Instead of a full reset, pick one stabilising habit:
a daily walk or light exercise (that you enjoy!)
earlier nights - a good excuse for a cuddling up in bed on dark nights with a favourite book
journalling - therapists are unanimous in the benefits of journalling.
a calmer morning routine - for those days when you can. Not every morning will allow you to waft around the house before starting your day ;)
Let everything else wait.
6. Watch for the ‘false urgency’ voice
That inner voice saying “I should be doing more” isn’t intuition — it’s conditioning.
Pause before obeying it.
A simple reflection for the first few weeks of January.
It might help to periodically stop to ask yourself these questions. And especially so if you start to feel a bit overwhelmed. And, they would make great questions to answer when you have a journalling session.
What pace would actually support me right now?
What would “kind momentum” look like?
What am I allowed to take slowly this year?
You don’t need all the answers yet.
You just need to honour where you are.
One last thing, from me to you
If you do nothing remarkable this week — you haven’t failed.
If you rest more than you planned — you’re not behind.I’m a huge believer in taking days off to have duvet days. See my previous newsletter here on the importance of duvet days at this stage in our lives.
If you enter January gently — you’re not lacking ambition.
You’re practising something far more powerful:
SELF TRUST
And that, my lovely 45 Not Out-ers, is the hook on which everything hangs, doesn’t it?
Sending oodles of love, warmth, happiness and success to you all for 2026.
Take the greatest care of yourself
Una x